Its an issue often talked about in media, in news papers, and in intellectual seminars. As I have often said, I hate seminars....only those attend the seminars who think it is fashionable to discuss 'grave' issues....and the target...I mean those who really bear the burns are piteously left out of the scenario. Awareness hardly comes here...
Anyways....I'll just narrate a story...about a friend who had been a victim of abuse in her childhood and still today how she struggles to come out of that trauma....I am no biologist to explain the internal manoeuvrings or a sociologist to talk crusade.
First I met her when I crossed my school and entered college. I cannot take her name...the very first thing I noticed, she was extremely fussy about anything and everything that was around her. She was deliberately feminist...I mean that showed that what she shows was not actually what she meant. For her men are lecherous, women should always fight....advocated single motherhood, single woman concept.....and many more
To be precise every thing that new age urban feminism stands for....she voiced them all...and to be frank my reaction was that of instant repulsion
While I also support what I mean to be feminism....but her violent mode of expression I did not like.....but little did I know then that that was a facade. Inspite of initial animosity...we grew friends and I learnt slowly by slowly......that she was abused, and none other than her own father was responsible. The case was burried.....a middle-class family...the little girl molested by her father....probably too much for any middle class family to disclose in public...and so her house-wife mom had to cope up....and obviously she too. I understood then what was there behind her aparent male-bashing attitude....she feared men....she felt nervous, felt some impending doom in presence of men....but once friend, once a man earns her trust.....she is simply such a sweet friend, lovely one to spend time with. She fell in love with a good friend of mine...now very happy....contended.....she now says that she is learning to believe that all men are not lech...though she still believes all women are abused....
It is difficult. A girl who have seen the very first man in her life to be so inhuman, for her to come out of that and accept that there are good men.....it is extremely difficult...after all where from can she gather that trust, thet faith that good men are there? And for a man to acquire her trust is another uphill task. She even feels uncomfortable in the proximity of her male class mates. They need time.Not sympathy....but a touch that can assure her that she can do what she feels....that there are people who understands what she wants and what she had been through. And the house-wife mothers should get enough economic support from the government so as to rear the the child single-handedly....while that inhuman dirt rot behind the bars....will our media-hyped feminist ensure that?
and what about those numerous men who are also abused in their childhood?
No comments:
Post a Comment